Please Wear Seatbelts

Two weeks ago, I got in a car accident. It’s a weird, frightening, and kind of hilarious story that I’ll tell sometime far in the future.

(Why are my best stories always ones that aren’t appropriate for public consumption?)

Everyone was completely fine, except the cars.

(Everyone was fine because everyone was wearing seatbelts! Please always wear seatbelts!!!) But as any accident more than a fender-bender is, it was scary and has forced me to think about the nature of mortality… and growing up.

First, adulthood.

Six years ago or two years ago or even six months ago, I would have been afraid to get back to driving a car after an accident like that. But I was back driving a car the same day. I’ve been driving more than I usually do the past few weeks to get things sorted, and because life doesn’t stop.

I guess that’s what adulthood is.

You get in a car accident, and then you immediately get back behind the wheel to deal with insurance.

My colleagues and friends have been wonderful. I’ve gotten loaned cars, baked goods, and all sorts of emotional and practical support. Even pet cacti appeared at a fortuitous time! I haven’t been alone at all. But I have had to make decisions on when I need support and whom to ask and when I really can stretch and sort things on my own, instead of just, like, calling my parents or college support system and expecting them to do things for me. Which has been the case since I’ve been an adult, but it’s seemed magnified the past few weeks.

And I’ve also realised how much stronger and better equipped I am to deal with these things now. As they say, it’s been a great growing experience. Maybe I won’t be mistaken for a 15-year-old anymore.

Second, mortality.

Up through school and college, everything is about next steps, building your knowledge and skills so you can finally go to college and finally finally be useful in the adult world. Even now, in my early twenties, a lot of what I do is skills-building so I can be a better worker and have more impact in the future.

But, humans are fragile.

So since the accident I’ve been thinking about what I can and should be doing in the present, for the present.

I’m trying to make concrete changes to what I do. There are things I’ve kept putting off, injustices that I could probably have some impact on now, not only when I’m older and wiser and have more skills.

It’s not the mindset of, oh, what would I be doing if I only had one year to live (I thought about this briefly. I’d be back in Boston). It’s more, what can I focus on giving day-to-day, both to myself and to others?

 

In other news:

My colleagues and I have been following the World Cup with enthusiasm (we have a continent-spanning Slack channel). If you haven’t seen Mexican fans’ reactions to South Korea’s win over Germany, check it out.

(The photo of this album is from one of the venues we’ve been watching the World Cup at. Zambia is lovely in winter. It’s warm during the day and cold at night, and after dark restaurants put out little braziers for warmth.)

I just read a novel about uptight Victorian dragons. Would recommend. Jo Walton has a wonderful imagination and deals with interesting themes (the premise of another of her books is “Pallas Athene decides to build the city from Plato’s Republic”). There’s just always a little something missing in the execution.

I’m also “running” my first half marathon this Sunday. I haven’t trained half as much as I’d have liked. You run over Victoria Falls! It’s going to be great!